Significantly reduce websocket api connection auth phase latency (#108564)

* Significantly reduce websocket api connection auth phase latancy

Since the auth phase has exclusive control over the websocket
until ActiveConnection is created, we can bypass the queue and
send messages right away. This reduces the latancy and reconnect
time since we do not have to wait for the background processing
of the queue to send the auth ok message.

* only start the writer queue after auth is successful